~Száz lakat alatt őrzött, titkos álomvilág~

One of my friends said "If I don't have any problems I will do it!" and it's right. I don't have any problem in school beacuse I pass my exam and I got good marks and my marks better than last year. Ok, my parents think it can be better than now, but it is better than last year so I am contented, just a little but I am contented. But I have this point in my life. The point where I know that my wish is impossible. I want to be positive but I see him every day and in my dreams too and he is so different in my dreams. I don't want to be sad but it isn't fair because my heart lie to me. In this times the nights are the worst. I just thinking and thinking and I can't sleep. I can't throw out this feelings and it hurts me. When I am at the school with my friends I am happy and when we just go anywhere or something like that I can turn off my mind, my heart. I just enjoy the moment. So I don't think to him every time just some days but in other days I don't perceive that he is so near to me. So in the end you can say that I am so crazy, stupid, ot idiot because I know that. And you can tell me that "Tell him!" but it's so unenecessary because I can't tell him. Not now. The summer is comeing and I want to do a lot of things and maybe in september the things will be change. I got a lot of plan. I want changes and maybe great partys. So, that's all.